Thoughts Out Of Season

Standing on the corner of Main and Macral in a small Midwest town, I hopped upon my soapbox and began to harangue the street's passerby". Hello out there all you Rush, Hannity, Levine, Romney fans and supporters. Can you believe that up to 47% of Americans pay no income taxes? Can you believe so many people live on handouts from the government? Imagine all those welfare mothers with their 80-90 kids? Those homeless mentally ill constantly bugging you on the street; that 70 year old lady who paid into social security for 40 years and now does nothing but live on the dole; that police officer that risked his life for twenty years and now collects what he believes is a well deserved pension; the fireman who had to leave the job on 3/4 salary after breaking his back rescuing some kid from a burning building". "Wait!" shouts a man wearing a tea shirt reading "Romney not Obamy", " what do you mean lumping firemen, police officers and little old ladies...

Well stop my heart and smack my bones. After 200 plus years we finally have a politician with a perfect understanding of that peculiar animal, the American. To paraphrase Mr. Romney, 47% percent of the population are nothing but a bunch of lazy loafers who's only goal in life is to live off the government teat, feet propped up all day watching television and drinking 2 dollar wine,expending no energy except when demanding handouts from the government at same time selfishly breathing in 47% of our nations precious oxygen supply. Just as remarkable is what was left unsaid by this modern day Socrates, in view of the audience present at this event, that the remaining 57% of the populace possess the virtues of being self-centered, avaricious, loathsome narcissists! Well knock me down and call me Shirley ! For the first time in American Political History we have a politician with a firm understanding of the general temperament of the American people. I bow down to this immen...

So Mitt Romney looks to be doing well at the primaries? He's charismatic, looks good and is a Mormon. Imagine if he's elected and passes a law that all American men must have more than one wife. That would be...would be... Great Caesars Ghost! Hey Abbott! Jumping Butterballs! More than one wife! Imagine,2,4,10 wives along with 2,4,10 mothers-in-law! And multiple brothers-in-law most of which will probably be looking to borrow money off you! Beware American Man, theoretically it could happen. I mean, look at Bring-em Young, grandfather of the Mormon faith, he had fifty-six. Yes, he lived to a ripe old age. Why? Those fifty-six hounds wouldn't let him die. He probably wanted to. Just now I bought an open ended airline ticket to the Canary Islands. This guy gets elected I'm running for cover at least until I know the coast is clear. BTW. Who names their kid Mitt? A frustrated minor league player?

Sorry, can't give you the whole scoop on the story but apparently something unprecedented in American radio occurred recently. Rush Limbaugh apologized to someone! Again, sorry I can't give anymore info because immediately after hearing the words "Rush apologized" I fell into such a swoon that hours later I'm still unsteady on my feet. Did he call the Pope The Anti-something? Did he run over an old woman in a parking lot? Pass gas on the air? I really don't know and don't care to know what he apologized for. The fact that he did it is what astounds me. It reminds me of what someone once said about a dog walking on its hind legs " he may not do it well but your amazed he can do it at all".

 Imagine a country supposedly so advanced as the United States that allows religion to have the slightest impact on politics. It must be the fact that three-quarters of our population are utter imbeciles that can't rely on themselves,but need the hope of the beyond as a salve for their dreary, forgettable, hum-drum lives . Want to see how people live in lands based on religion, try taking a look at such other countries as Iran. Iraq, Sudan, Saudi Arabia, or states like Tennessee, etc, where people live their lives adhering to ghost stories that should have been put to rest the moment man began to paint on cave walls. Would you like to live in one of them? By grace, no you wouldn't, gosh no. Imagine a supposedly intelligent race of beings believing in such bunk. You  tell me " They speak the Truth" (whatever the hell that is)!Then: If true then how do you explain atro...

Do the Muslims scare me? No. It is the American reaction that both frightens and disturbs me.Why? Because there are millions and millions of people who have been chaffing under the rule of cruel dictators and rulers finally getting the chance to be heard, to fight, die for freedom, and what concerns us? How these protests, these yearnings to be free are going to affect us. The residents of the  Home of the Free and Land of the Brave are acting like a bunch of frightened weasels. "Is the Muslim Brotherhood going to take over"? "Are they going to revive the Caliphate and try to take over the world"?. A close friend of mine was freaking today because , according to him the Saudis "are not going to sell us oil anymore because we did not back Murabek". When I kindly reminded him that a great majority of the men who brought about the 9/11 disaster were Saudis, he said "that's a different $#%^ing thing". Imagine Americans frightened at the thought o...

Yesterday's surprise announcement of  the imminent onset of the Second Coming of the Messiah set  off a furious scramble by Republican funded lobbyists to beseech the world's religious leaders to act on their behalf and to petition the Lord in delaying His arrival until after the coming mid-term elections. Republicans, fearful the the event would  shine positively on the Obama administration have charged the lobbying firm, We Screw You But Not US with the task of pleading their case to The Pope and others of his stature and ilk. John Slafe, CEO of the aforementioned lobbying firm,  sweating profusely while waiting on line at the Vatican seemed both excited and confident that his firm's efforts would be instrumental on  pushing back the upcoming Heaven on Earth for at least a few months, was quoted as saying " Of course I'm confident that the Good Lord will hear our pleas. He is kind, compassionate and and always open to reason. Besides", Mr. Slaf...